۞ Biggest Idiots English SMS Messages Collection ۞
 ۝☺Ultimate LOGNEST & LARGEST Categorized SMS Messages Collection☻۝

boy:yeh tere do tango k bichme kya hai. girl:yeh 1 lakir hai,par tere do tango k bichme kya latak raha hai. boy:yeh uss lakir ka fakir hai  

Santa tripped on a broken curb and went to the hospital.
After examining him, the doctor said, "I have some good news, and some bad news for you. First of all, you'll never be able to work again."
Santa replied, "Okay, now what's the bad news?"

Customer: Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up?
Waiter: I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.

Santa in an antique shop, “Do you have anything new?”

Q: How do you recognize Santa's son in School?
A: He is the one who erases the books when the teacher erases the board.

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Santa raping a gal in car. A cop came & said: What are you doing?
Santa: I'm raping her.
Cop: Ok, I'm next.
Santa: Fine, but I have never raped a cop before.

Pappu: Papa jab aap Honeymoon pe gaye the tab mein kahan tha?
Santa: Putar, jaate waqt tu mere paas tha aur aatey waqt mammi ke paas.

In UK, Santa & Banta saw a poster at a Police station: Two White men wanted for Rape.
Santa: These bloody goraas always get the best jobs.

Santa: Yaar tujhe bus mein thapad kyun pada?
Banta: Pata nahin yaar, meri photo neeche gir gayee thi, maine kaha behen ji zara saadi upar karna photo leni hai.

Santa travelling in Virgin Atlantic asked 4 milk. Air hostess put her nipple in his mouth.
Santa: acha hua paani nahi maanga.

Santa and Banta were watching bungee jumping.
Santa: Wanna try it?
Banta: No way. I was born because of broken rubber & I don't wanna die because of it.

Why did English teacher slap Santa?
Because Santa asked her: why is Bra is singular when it covers 2 & Panties plural when it covers only one?

Jeeto: Oh zara dheere karo, kyon Shatabdi chala rahe ho, Maalgadi chalaao.
Itne mein Pappu bed se gira aur bola jo marzi chalaao par sawaari ko to mat giraao.

  Jeeto goes 2 repair umbrella. The man said: Upar ka kapda nikalna padega, Neeche se danda dalna padega.
Jeeto: Kuch bhi karo but pani andar nahi ana chaiye.   A female Press Reporter slaps Santa. Banta standing near asks Santa: why did she slap you?
Santa: On her T-shirt was written 'Press', so I just pressed…   Santa was asked to give a talk on Sex
He walked to the podium, adjusted the microphone & said: Ladies n Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure...
And sat back down.   Preeto: Suno ji, aaj phir billi dudh pi gayee.
Santa: Main tainu kinni vaari keha hai ki apne blouse de button band karke soya kar.